Some Kind of Monster.
Metallica.
The name alone conveys a destructive energy one can’t fight. I mean, say it with me..”METAAALLLICAAA.” If you say it enough, you get pumped. you want to break stuff. You want to get your frustrations out. It conveys a sense of urgency. A sense of doom. A sense of destruction. A sense of “I’m not going to take it anymore.” I was never a big fan of the band because of these reasons..at least years ago. They were loud, they were scary, they had long hair. hen I was a kid Metallica was the antithesis to my views of music.
Then I turned 18.
Teenage years suck. Let’s face it. Unless you have a whole lot of money. And a lot of power. Being a teen is pretty horrible. At 16, I started changing my listening tastes a little. And then I started listening to “Enter Sandman” a song that was popular when I was say…13. I didn’t pay too much attention to it. I just thought they were white dudes with long hell that screamed. But then as I got older, I revisited the song. I was amazed. By the time I got back into the song, I was picking and prodding the song. I was listening to everything..the bass, the drums, the riffs..it was incredible. It was so full of energy, yet at the same time, rage and frustration with the little kid that is scared to death of the sandman. I was definitely becoming a fan. I couldn’t get over the riffs. They were just amazing. The whole band. Soon I began listening to other Metallica songs, just to cope with how I was feeling. I didn’t really listen to the words, I was just enamored with the music pushing the words into my ears, forcing me to listen. I was hooked. Completely. Hooked. I couldn’t get over listening to a band called “Metallica.” If someone who knew me at 11 said at some point, I would be listening to hard, fast, metal, I would have looked at them like they lost their minds.
I will fast forward a bit. To an album they released that got so much flak, it was rediculous. St. Anger. Now, this wasn’t a fantastic album. It wasn’t like the Black album. It wasn’t even like Garage, Inc. There was as much rage as ever, but it wasn’t as fast as one thought. The drums sounded like pings..ping ping ping..like a pinball machine. But I still liked it. I didn’t like the whole thing, but I did like some of it. One song in particular..”Some Kind of Monster.” That should have been the title track. Not so much st. anger. Which reminds me, I need a new tattoo..anyhooters.. Some Kind of Monster is a song I never heard on the radio. But it’s a true Metallica song through and through. The Lyrics speak for themselves:
This is the beating you’ll never know
These are the lips that taste no freedom
This is the feel thats not so safe
This is the face you’ll never change
This is the god that ain’t so pure
This is the god that is that pure
This is the voice of silence no more.
This is how I feel on a nightly basis. I feel like this song completely speaks to me in a way no one could ever ever understand. This is what keeps me going. I’m depressed and I realize this. I need to see the doctor but with Metallica..they are my therapists. They are what I need to get by. And this song was my theme song for a good year of my life. That and “Frantic.” I really think the cd wasn’t given a fair shot in some regards. And in others I think it was. It wasn’t fast paced completely. But the lyrics to this song make me want to smash a wall. Over and over again. And after it’s over, I step back into myself, and live my life. And back into reality.
And this is why I love music.
